Identity
By Rachel Kish
We have so many labels for ourselves. Labels we are given, labels we claim, labels we try to get away from. We sometimes confuse our labels with our identity, thinking we are good or bad based on our performance in those areas, and we lose focus on who we are called to be. It can bring hopelessness into our lives. Thoughts like “I will never be good enough” and “There will always be someone better” enter our minds, and we are left confused.
During one of the darkest times of my life, a friend introduced me to a book called “You Are Special” by Max Lucado. I was ready to dive into a self-help book and work on all my issues so that I could stop feeling so hopeless. I wanted strategies for taking control back and finding peace my own way. I was ready for steps I could follow to be a better mom, daughter, sister, wife, friend, teacher, leader, etc. But this book was none of those things. It was actually an illustrated children’s book. I was taken aback by its simplicity, but was obedient to my friend, who was also my mentor.
I took the book home, looked at the pictures, and tried to figure out the correct pronunciation of the characters in the book, little wooden people called Wemmicks. They are carved by the woodcarver, who has a workshop up on the hill. The Wemmicks spend their days giving star and dot stickers to each other for good and bad behaviors and talents. The main character, Punchinello, isn’t very good at anything; he gets a lot of bad marks. He starts to seclude himself so no one will give him more dots, which means he is bad. He would even get dots for having so many dots! One day he meets a Wemmick without any dot or star stickers. She tells him that if he wants the joy she has, he will need to see the woodcarver, Eli. Punchinello is hesitant at first but decides to go. He has a reverence for how big everything is and how powerful Eli must be. Eli knows his name, listens to his questions, and tenderly tells him that he is special not for what he does, but for who made him.
The kind of love expressed in this book is so life-giving. Lucia, the Wemmick without any stickers, is who we are called to be for others. She is different – she doesn’t let what the other Wemmicks say define her, good or bad. Sometimes we hang on to people’s compliments and they can be as destructive to us as their negative remarks. God has called us to lean in on what He says about us and not seek the approval of others.
Eli tells Punchinello that he needs to come see him every day. Then he will start believing what the woodcarver thinks of him more than what the other Wemmicks think. As Punchinello starts to believe Eli, a dot falls off of him. As we believe what God says about us, the pain of others’ judgments will fall off of us too. When God calls us to come to Him every day and commune with Him, it is for our own sakes. I find that the commands of God, if obeyed, truly do bring joy and peace into our lives. We no longer believe the lies that others have distracted us with. We are free to follow Him wherever He is calling us because we are no longer afraid to make mistakes and be judged.
I believe each of us goes through times when we feel lost, alone, left behind, and forgotten. In those moments, we turn to what is true. We continue renewing our minds daily. Knowing who God says you are is the key to fighting back and allowing those fiery darts to fall off of you.
After this book changed my view of God and His love for me, it went on to change the hearts of my husband, my adopted daughter, and my biological children too. I hope you are able to see a new level of care and love from the Father through this beautifully healing children’s book.
I leave you with this passage:
“Looks like you’ve been given some bad marks.”
“I didn’t mean to, Eli. I really tried hard.”
“Oh, you don’t have to defend yourself to me, child. I don’t care what the other Wemmicks think.”
“You don’t?”
“No, and you shouldn’t either. Who are they to give stars or dots? They’re Wemmicks just like you. What they think doesn’t matter, Punchinello. All that matters is what I think, and I think you are pretty special.”
Rachel Kish is a wife, mother of 4 (adopted and bio), music teacher, youth leader, mentor and friend. Originally from the suburbs of Chicago, Rachel moved out to VT after graduation from Olivet Nazarene University and marrying her husband Eddie. There her husband was called to be the Senior Pastor for 8 years. During that time, Rachel started a violin program at a local public school with low income students. In 2023, the Kish family moved to NH to take
on a new adventure and follow God’s path for their lives. In her spare time, she likes to play board games with her kids, go on bike rides, learn Spanish, learn ukulele, and plan events for her neighborhood kids and families.